Dark and, at times, amusing fiction from award-winning author Dave Zeltserman

Monday, December 21, 2020

Noir collection free for next two days


I've made UNLUCKY SEVEN free on Amazon for the net two day. Grab a copy now!

Sunday, December 6, 2020

From Unlucky Seven


In my story Something's Not Right, the following letter which my protagonist writer can't let go drives the story:

After your earlier letter I was expecting at the least a diverting read, and not the excruciatingly hackneyed and clich├ęd disaster that you sent me. Your inane plot plodded along at a pace that made me want to drive sharpened spikes through my eyes, your characters barely qualified as cardboard cutouts, and your dialog was what I’d expect from a failing eighth grade creative writing student. The only thing that kept me reading your ‘masterpiece’ to the bitter end was my fascination over how shockingly bad it is.

I know you must be disappointed that I cannot offer even a single word of encouragement, but I can offer advice. Please, for the love of God, never put pen to paper again unless it is to compose a suicide note. Even that, I’m afraid, would end up as an unreadable mess.

Best of luck in your future career as a busboy or other such endeavor which I’m sure you’ll be eminently qualified for.

I invite other writers to share their worst rejection letters.

Saturday, December 5, 2020

New noir collection!

I've put up as a kindle book on Amazon a 7-story noir collection. Stories in this collection:

Brother's Keeper (Edgar and Macavity nominee)
The Last Santa
Emma Sue (honorable mention in Best American Mystery Stories)
The Caretaker of Lorne Green
Some People Deserve to Die
A Guilty Conscience
Something's Not Right

The Last Santa and A Guilty Conscience are original stories for this collection.